I read books from time to time and have always been fascinated by the acknowledgements and the dedications. The acknowledgements I get but I often read dedications and wonder if they are sincere. The ones to moms and dads probably are. The sappy ones to kids and spouses probably kind-of are. But some of those others? I’ve wondered. Mine, when I have published books, are going to be VERY SINCERE, more sincere than a pumpkin patch on Halloween. I’ve got a snarky one for an ex-boyfriend. I have a loving one for my deceased grandmother. I have a good one for two of the women who all but strung me up over a printing press and forced me to get something out there. No, I don’t actually have any finished books to put these dedications in; heck, some of my stories aren’t even started and they already have dedications. I just strongly feel it’s never too early to start dedicating.
Do the people who have things dedicated to them know about the dedications? I am sure many of them do. However, I always wonder when I read new authors and I see my name in the dedication, “Do I know this person? Is s/he writing under a pen name? Is that dedication to me?” It would seem I am pretty full of myself. This probably comes as no surprise. To anyone. But do other people do this, too? Is it common to see your name in a dedication and wonder if it’s you?
Something that frustrates me is that so many dedications are vague, the whole “To my Dibbly Wizzles. You know who you are.” Do they? Does each Dibbly Wizzle know s/ he is a Dibbly Wizzle? Are there Dibbly Wizzles who are excluded from this group? Do they know they’re excluded? My dedications won’t be like that. I am going to be as upfront and obvious as possible. Like the one to the ex-boyfriend. I won’t use his full name, but I can use his first and middle name. Or his initials and last name. Or his Social Security number. However I do it, I plan to end his dedication with: Because I KEEP MY PROMISES, Jackass. Pretty good, right? I’ve given this some thought.
That brings me to a totally different rail for my train of thought. How many people find out their exes have become writers and they read the exes’ work looking for themselves, for something familiar, or for a reason to hate their exes even more? Wouldn’t that be weird? And you know this happens, you know that some poor guy is walking down the street and he sees his horrible ex’s picture on the back of a best selling book so he has to go to the library or bookstore or Google to make sure it’s the same person and finds out this hated (or maybe still-pined-for) person has rocketed into stardom overnight. What does he do? Get a copy of the book and read it? Or burn it? Or leave malicious, one-star reviews for the book online?
I don’t keep up with my exes. Once they’re out of my life, they’re gone so I don’t know if any of them have become famous or anything. I don’t think I’d knowingly follow their stuff even if I did know. Maybe I would. I don’t know. The situation has never come up. But if my exes keep track of me, one of them will totally see the dedication to him in my really great book and will be all, “Damn. That girl DOES keep her promises. I shouldn’t have been such a jackass.”
**This post is dedicated to Gabe and Pam who pretty much made me start this blog in the first place. Also, it’s brought to you by the number 9 and the letters EKGO**
Post Script: This is an accidental post brought on by lack of sleep and the inability to find the Save Draft button. Sorry for any confusion this may have caused…me. Because it really did confuse me that this showed up when I thought I’d just put it back in the hopper. We will now return to our regularly scheduled program.