The glue that binds. Well, sticks. And is messy.

Ugh. It’s the time of year again in which I feel obliged to acknowledge my stupid husband.

Fitting that this day falls upon April 1st, isn’t it?

Every once in awhile, I think about Gabe and not in the context of smothering him in his sleep or poisoning his food. Sometimes, I reminisce on how we got together (and what I could have done to avoid it) and chuckle.

Today, I was thinking about the moment he fell in love with me.

Now, if you ask Gabe, he’ll say that he’d been in love with me for years but that would be a lie. Gabe’s a sappy romantic and makes up crap because he thinks it’s sweet. It’s not, it’s nauseating.

Back to the In Love moment: We were driving along, just friends who were going on some adventure or another (Gabe could probably tell you what we were doing because he always remembers that stuff. Reason: see above)

He was being all snobbish about how great he is, talking about movies and doing that thing where he throws out titles no one else has ever heard of so that he looks all artsy and hipsterish. I don’t remember exactly what he said, though I am sure he does, referencing an esoteric little piece and I, having seen and loved the movie he was quoting, started singing this:

Gabe’s jaw fell from his head and landed in his lap. He just stared at me. It is true that I felt pretty smug inside for besting him at his own snotty little game.

He whispered, “I’ve never met anyone else who knows that movie,” and I knew he’d just been struck by Cupid’s damned arrow.

And now look. We’re old married people and the only thing I look forward to is putting him into his grave.

But you know what? We’re a pretty good couple.

One heart, one song…but there is no ONE – Happy It-All-Started-Today Anniversary, HusbandFace.



Filed under My Dearly Beloveds

4 responses to “The glue that binds. Well, sticks. And is messy.

  1. Miriam

    “Marriage is finding that special someone you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”

    Happy anniversary, ya schmoops!

    • haha! We are total schmoops!

      And thank you. I can only ever remember this anniversary because it happens on April Fools Day and our wedding anniversary. Gabe, though, he’s got a dozen anniversaries for us. I don’t even remember what they are let alone when. 🙂

  2. I pissed myself laughing at the bit about putting your beloved husband in his grave. Aww that’s SO sweet, and even romantic in its own way…
    PS Happy belated April Fool’s Anniversary.
    PPS. I have never seen this movie before, had no idea anything like it even existed. It must’ve been the 80s surely – I’m getting a bit of a Xanadu vibe…

    • Hahaha!
      Yes, Gabe and I are a little like Spy vs. Spy. It makes for a fun relationship. 😀

      Oh, yes, Rock ‘n’ Rule is totally an 80’s movie. I think you can piece most of it together on Youtube…you know, if you’re ever really bored and need to watch strange ’80’s cartoons not made for children.

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